Miscellaneous texts

– How was this accident?
– By what accident?
– You probably won't, that you've been like this since you were born…

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I do not think, that you are stupid. But what is my humble opinion compared to thousands of different ones??

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It's no fun to drink – art to keep.

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The truth is like an ass – everyone has their own.

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I have a strong will. I told myself once, that I will drink and… I drink!

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No one has ever died from vodka. And many were born…

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Come, I will clone you…

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This is eye-catching, like a nun in a brothel.

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– How old are you?
– So much, how old do I look.
– P*** no, people don't live that long.

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I'm vegetarian. When I was growing up, we worshiped animals, because my mother was a cow. Kidding – my father loves this joke.

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Thanks to the Union, your son will find a husband.

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The inscription on the wall above the urinal: Why are you looking here? The joke is in your hands.

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Words cannot describe your outfit, so i just throw up.

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Hiya – or there isn't.

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I've seen tables with legs that look better than yours.

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If the mirror had a throat, that would piss you off.

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A very biased person, what do you think about humanity?

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Sometimes the only way out of a situation is to go out for a beer.

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If my pants aren't down to my ankles, don't open your mouth!

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Let the farts out of your ass!

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I'm fine here, I'm warm here, I will breed here…

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Oral sex is a matter of taste.

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Negro beauty: lips to breast, breasts to lips and lips to knees.

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Were you born as an ass or is it the result of many years of practice?

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The better part of you must have flowed down your father's legs.

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How is it not, what you like, it likes, what is not.

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You don't have a mom. Two dads and a set “Little Chemist” they don't count.

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Zosia, you have perfect radio conditions.

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You know, you're having a bad day, when your twin sister forgets your birthday.

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Why don't you do something else with your hair? For example, you will not wash them?

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They called it premenstrual syndrome, because mad cow disease was already taken.

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How many people like you come in per kilogram?

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such, how about you, I feed the ostriches.

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Be careful who you dance with, because you may not finish the piece.

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… And then he put down the camera and pitched me for two hours…